AKA – Tracie has a date with a Vampire

We’ll get to the vampire later.  Today was my visit to the geneticist.  I wasn’t sure what to expect but let me tell you, it was a LOT.  First I met the nice nurse Laurie who did my vitals and explained in detail everything the doctor was going to talk about.  She said it was going to be a lot and she wasn’t wrong.  First things first, put on the awesome johnny and enter the doctor.

Family Tree

He was super nice – a little odd, but so very nice, and he asked a LOT of questions.  Where I was born, where my grandparents were born and where my great grandparents were born.  Honestly if I ha known he as going to ask that much detail, I would have printed out a copy of my family tree.  He then explained about the brca gene.  Now here is the thing, I was already 99% confident I didn’t have the brca genes.  Twin A and I had both done the 23 and me DNA test and that said I didn’t have it.  Now, I am NOT an idiot.  I was not putting all my faith in a test that involved me mailing a vial of my spit across the country, but it did make me feel more confident.

The doctor did a rather comprehensive exam that involved not only my boobs getting squeezed by another stranger but he checked reflexes and a bunch of other things.  It was way more in depth than my usual physicals to be honest.  All the while we talked about this, that and the other.  Topics ranged from teaching, to stuffed shells to him growing up in the Bronx.  All designed to put me at ease.  However I’m a super introvert and hate chit chat so I was wired tighter than a guitar.

Enter the Vampire

Next I was escorted to the lab for my blood tests.  There was a bit of delay so the nice nurse waited with me, which made it worse.  Why?  Small talk, that’s why.  Now she had one vial she needed blood for because it needed to get shipped to the lab out in California to test for the brca gene that I don’t have.  When we entered the lab, she had her pretty purple tube (yay purple) and on the table were no less that 14 tubes.  Yes, you read that right, 14 tubes.

Now I was getting worried.  Not only do I have non existent veins, I also tend to not bleed easily – unless I cut my leg shaving. Anyhow Angel John the vampire did a really good job of hitting the vein in one try, after much searching, slapping of my arm and tightening the tourniquet. They barely managed to get the 15 vials of blood when my vein said it was done.  Poor vampire John started labeling the different tubes when he realized he needed still more blood.  I was a bit worried because I was pretty sure I was tapped out.  He left to talk to his supervisor, and they decided that if I wanted, they could steal blood from the different vials to fill up what they needed.  I was game to try again and he tried once but my veins had a different game plan and did not cooperate, so he was left with robbing Peter to pay Paul and fill the extra vials.  Not my problem

Then he had the nerve to ask for a urine sample.  Seriously?  I didn’t think I had any liquid in me at all, but I am nothing if not a  good patient so I gave it the old college try.

The Waiting is the Hardest Part

Now as I said, I was fairly confident that I did not have the brca genes courtesy of 23 and me, but I wasn’t putting all my eggs in that particular basket.  I was given a nifty code to trace my test, and now I will check, several times a day for the results.  Results that I know are going to be negative, but I still need to check.  I think they are also looking at some other things so it will be interesting to see what they find.